Tag: relationships

  • The Amazing and Fabulous LaSirene and Agwe!

    Oh this is a good one!  Well, of course all of our free rituals are amazing… but this power couple of the sea is always a fan favorite! 🙂

    Our next free online ritual will be honoring Capitaine Agwe and LaSirene –  the king and queen of the ocean! Husband and wife, they rule the seas from their majestic underwater kingdom. With all the wealth of the ocean, they can help in financial matters. With a love as enduring and timeless as the seas, they can help in love situations. As a Voodoo couple, they can bring their power to a very wide variety of situations!

    Join us on Sunday, August 30 at 2:00 PM Eastern (1 PM Central, 12 PM Mountain, 11 AM Pacific) in honoring and petitioning LaSirene and Capitaine Agwe!

    Anyone and everyone can join or participate completely anonymously in our online rituals. The rituals are done in real time, live online. You remain nameless and faceless and just enjoy the ritual in the comfort of your own home! Spellmaker offers these rituals free online via a webcam – you will not be seen, but you can see the ritual as it is happening.

    Get more information on how to participate here:  http://www.spellmaker.com/prayer.htm

    La Sirene Voodoo Ritual

    Love, light, and peace,

    Mambo Samantha Corfield

    www.spellmaker.com

     

  • Relationship advice from the Harvard Business School!

    Well, sort of! I found  this short article published by the Harvard Business School which talks about how to avoid those pesky knee-jerk reactions we can have in tough situations or during tough conversations. And while we try really hard not to get into these tough conversations in the immediate post-casting period, sometimes, well, stuff happens! And sure, we are not in a "business" relationship with our HDs, we are still in a relationship and this advice seems very applicable. The actual HBR tips are at the bottom of this post. These 3 here have been modified for our particular situations:

    1 – Know yourself! Take some time and look back at how you have reacted in the past in difficult situations and how other people reacted. This can be the hardest thing of all to do! But we can not change what we are not aware of (Sorry for the Dr. Phil reference!) so even though it can be tough, spend some time in reflection on this topic.

    2- Have a plan! It is infinitely easier to come up with a plan when you are NOT in the heat of the moment. If things have been tense with your HD and there is a chance things might go sideways, thing ahead and have plan incase they do. If you are having trouble coming up with a plan, ask your caseworker.

    3- Its OK to say No! (Sometimes…) so this one I have  to put a caveat. Certainly, if you are feeling super emotional or sad or angry then for sure, it may not be the best time to see HD that day. Why set yourself (and your spellwork) up for failure? If you are just maybe in a snit because HD did not return your text fast enough, then sorry – Suck it up, Buttercup! Take the high road, be nice, polite and responsive 🙂 This one is a little tricky, and again, if you have any questions or need any guidance, by all means ask your caseworker. Oh – and avoid sarcasm. Trust me! When tensions are high, it is *always* misinterpreted!

    Strive for this –                   

    not this –

    Love

    Sister Bridget

     

    Override Your Default Reactions in a Tough Conversation (From Harvard Business Review 7/3/14)

     
    In a difficult conversation, our default reactions can lead to unproductive outcomes. You’ll perform better in those tough moments if you’re conscious of how you want to react. Here’s how:

    • Know your defaults. Make a list of daily interpersonal situations, like meetings, conversations, negotiations, and conflicts. Then identify your default behaviors — interrupting, becoming aggressive, micromanaging, or jumping to conclusions.
    • Plan your overrides. Before these challenging moments arise, envision how you’d ideally like to respond. For instance, if you want to overcome your tendency to interrupt, rehearse being a more active, engaged listener.
    • Design your days. Self-control varies across a day and a workweek. Why schedule high-conflict conversations before lunch or at the end of the day? If your morning becomes unexpectedly difficult, reshuffle your afternoon to avoid letting a snide comment or criticism slip.
  • ‘Tis the Season!

    Hello good folks!

    Seasoned Spellmaker friends and family know the season of which I speak:  Love Potion #9 making season!

    Remember, Love Potion #9 is made starting 9:00 a.m. on 9/9 – every year! So the time is coming soon!

    This potion IS a drinkable potion.  It is meant to slip a little bit into your intended's drink or food.  It is a classic love potion. There are some other lesser known usages that I will also blog about later.

    But what, if you say, you do not have an "intended" or you don't have access?  Take heart, make the potion anyway.  I feel like making this potion is a great affirmation stating that you will get your intended (or someone better!).  Besides, the potion making process is pretty wonderful, soothing, magickal!

    The recipe for the potion is located on the Spellmaker website, right where it has been for years and years:

    http://www.spellmaker.com/potion9.htm

    Khouzhan Lucy posted on the Spellmaker Novitate blog about it, too! 🙂

    So get to planning, get to making! Oh, and as we found out in 9/9/9 – it cans really well! If you are into canning or can boil some water and use a canning jar, it seals up nicely and when we opened one to check it three years later  - still perfect!  

    Love, Mambo Sam

    www.spellmaker.com

     
    Love-potion

  • How much is too much?

    Hi there-

    I came across this very good little commentary and wanted to share! It says so much in a few paragraphs. How much is enough? How much is good for us to tolerate? or not tolerate? I hope you all find this as helpful as I did.

    Love

    Sister Bridget

    Too much Tolerance can be a Bad Thing.

    Commentary 

    By

    Robert Pagliarini

    (MoneyWatch) You may not know it, but you have a tolerance meter — an internal gauge that tells you when enough is enough. The problem for many is that their tolerance meter is set too high — that they put up with far too much for far too long. We stay at jobs we hate because it is "comfortable enough," and because changing requires so much more energy. We'll endure critical bosses who never have nice things to say about us because we tell ourselves that they're not "that bad." We'll live paycheck to paycheck for years because we fool ourselves into thinking it's the "best we can do."

    It is easy to fall into the mental trap of mediocrity. Because it doesn't take much to get by, we grow complacent. We stop growing and seeking challenges. We don't push ourselves to succeed. We cultivate a lifestyle well below our potential, but one that is just good enough that it doesn't require much challenge or action.

    Tolerance is critical for survival. It has allowed us to endure horrific conditions by helping us quickly adapt to the situation. Our ability to adapt to our surroundings is both a gift and a curse. There are some life forms that cannot survive unless their conditions are ideal. Vary their environment even a little and they perish. We don't have this problem. We can tolerate, and even flourish, in wild extremes.

    But when it comes to our careers, relationships, health, and lives, tolerance and adaptability are also curses. It's amazing how much we can tolerate when our environment changes slowly. Incremental change is our worst enemy. It permits us to gradually accept living standards that we never would have accepted in the beginning.

    The best way to determine if you have settled is to take an honest look at your present situation. Are you where you want to be? Have you forgotten once vivid dreams and aspirations? Success has been defined as the progressive realization of a worthy goal. Based on this definition, are you successful?

    There is a dark side to not "settling." I'm sure there is at least one person in your life that suffers from the belief that nothing is ever good enough. No matter how successful they become or how much money they make, they are never satisfied with their lives. This mindset is a guaranteed formula for frustration and unhappiness. So while it is healthy and motivating to work for and dream about reaching your goals, it is imperative to be thankful for where you are and what you already have. Regardless of your situation, you have a thousand things for which to give thanks. Do not lose sight of these aspects of your life. Don't lose sight of how far you've come and of what you've already accomplished on your journey in life.

    The solution is to demand more from yourself (and often from others!). Draw a line in the sand and make a commitment to progress. Look at your situation with a set of fresh eyes and ask yourself, "How can I do better?" The moment you realize getting by isn't good enough is the moment your life can start to change.

      © 2013 CBS Interactive Inc..

  • A Word About Betrayal.

    DON'T.

    Seriously.  Life will be much easier on you.

    Love,

    Mambo Samantha Corfield, www.spellmaker.com


    Betrayal_heart (1)


  • On FB and in a relationship – this is a MUST READ!

    Happy Friday!

    Do you want this….

     

    or this?

    I came across this artlcle last night just before bed, and I had to restrain myself from getting up right then and there and posting the link!  Over the past few years, I have seen this exact thing happen over and over — some of you who I have read with will remember me telling you to get off of FB and stop looking at certain people's profiles — For The Good of your Case! I am so glad that there are people looking into this issue of the impact of FB and the whole new level of knowledge or exposure we have about other people in our lives. Being able to look into someone's life this closely was not heard of 10 or 15 years ago – and of course, people were not sharing this much information then either. Balance is everything!

    I do hope this article is helpful to some! And have a great weekend everyone!

    Love

    Sister Bridget

    Excessive Facebook use can damage relationships, study finds

    Facebook and other social networking web sites have revolutionized the way people create and
    maintain relationships.  However, new research shows that Facebook use could actually be damaging
    to users' romantic relationships. Russell Clayton, a doctoral student in the University of Missouri
    School of Journalism, found that individuals who use Facebook excessively are far more likely to
    experience Facebook–related conflict with their romantic partners, which then may cause negative
    relationship outcomes including emotional and physical cheating, breakup and divorce.
    In their study, Clayton, along with Alexander Nagurney, an instructor at the University of Hawaii at Hilo,
    and Jessica R. Smith, a doctoral student at St. Mary's University in San Antonio, surveyed Facebook users ages 18 to 82 years old. Participants were asked to describe how often they used Facebook and how much, if any, conflict arose between their current or former partners as a result of Facebook use. The researchers found that high levels of Facebook use among couples significantly predicted Facebook-related conflict, which then significantly predicted negative relationship outcomes such as cheating, breakup, and divorce. "Previous research has shown that the more a person in a romantic relationship uses Facebook, the more likely they are to monitor their partner's Facebook activity more stringently, which can lead to feelings of jealousy," Clayton said. "Facebook-induced jealousy may lead to arguments concerning past partners. Also, our study found that excessive Facebook users are more likely to connect or reconnect with other Facebook users, including previous partners, which may lead to emotional and physical cheating."
    Clayton says this trend was particularly apparent in newer relationships.
    "These findings held only for couples who had been in relationships of three years or less," Clayton said.
    "This suggests that Facebook may be a threat to relationships that are not fully matured. On the other hand, participants who have been in relationships for longer than three years may not use Facebook as often, or may have more matured relationships, and therefore Facebook use may not be a threat or concern."
    In order to prevent such conflict from arising, Clayton recommends couples, especially those who have not been together for very long, to limit their own personal Facebook use.
    "Although Facebook is a great way to learn about someone, excessive Facebook use may be damaging to
    newer romantic relationships," Clayton said. "Cutting back to moderate, healthy levels of Facebook usage could help reduce conflict, particularly for newer couples who are still learning about each other."
    This study is forthcoming in the Journal of Cyberpsychology, Behavior and Social Networking.

    

    ships. However, new
    research shows that Facebook use could actually be damaging to users'
    romantic relationships. Russell Clayton, a doctoral student in the
    University of Missouri School of Journalism, found that individuals who
    use Facebook excessively are far more likely to experience
    Facebook–related conflict with their romantic partners, which th

    Read more at: http://phys.org/news/2013-06-excessive-facebook-relationships.html#jCp

    ships. However, new
    research shows that Facebook use could actually be damaging to users'
    romantic relationships. Russell Clayton, a doctoral student in the
    University of Missouri School of Journalism, found that individuals who
    use Facebook excessively are far more likely to experience
    Facebook–related conflict with their romantic partners, which th

    Read more at: http://phys.org/news/2013-06-excessive-facebook-relationships.html#jCp

    ships. However, new
    research shows that Facebook use could actually be damaging to users'
    romantic relationships. Russell Clayton, a doctoral student in the
    University of Missouri School of Journalism, found that individuals who
    use Facebook excessively are far more likely to experience
    Facebook–related conflict with their romantic partners, which th

    Read more at: http://phys.org/news/2013-06-excessive-facebook-relationships.html#jCp

    ships. However, new
    research shows that Facebook use could actually be damaging to users'
    romantic relationships. Russell Clayton, a doctoral student in the
    University of Missouri School of Journalism, found that individuals who
    use Facebook excessively are far more likely to experience
    Facebook–related conflict with their romantic partners, which th

    Read more at: http://phys.org/news/2013-06-excessive-facebook-relationships.html#jCp

    ships. However, new
    research shows that Facebook use could actually be damaging to users'
    romantic relationships. Russell Clayton, a doctoral student in the
    University of Missouri School of Journalism, found that individuals who
    use Facebook excessively are far more likely to experience
    Facebook–related conflict with their romantic partners, which th

    Read more at: http://phys.org/news/2013-06-excessive-facebook-relationships.html#jCp

    ships. However, new
    research shows that Facebook use could actually be damaging to users'
    romantic relationships. Russell Clayton, a doctoral student in the
    University of Missouri School of Journalism, found that individuals who
    use Facebook excessively are far more likely to experience
    Facebook–related conflict with their romantic partners, which th

    Read more at: http://phys.org/news/2013-06-excessive-facebook-relationships.html#jCp

    ships. However, new
    research shows that Facebook use could actually be damaging to users'
    romantic relationships. Russell Clayton, a doctoral student in the
    University of Missouri School of Journalism, found that individuals who
    use Facebook excessively are far more likely to experience
    Facebook–related conflict with their romantic partners, which th

    Read more at: http://phys.org/news/2013-06-excessive-facebook-relationships.html#jCp

    ships. However, new
    research shows that Facebook use could actually be damaging to users'
    romantic relationships. Russell Clayton, a doctoral student in the
    University of Missouri School of Journalism, found that individuals who
    use Facebook excessively are far more likely to experience
    Facebook–related conflict with their romantic partners, which th

    Read more at: http://phys.org/news/2013-06-excessive-facebook-relationships.html#jCp

    Facebook and other
    social networking web sites have revolutionized the way people create
    and maintain relationships. However, new research shows that Facebook
    use could actually be damaging to users' romantic relationships. Russell
    Clayton, a doctoral student in the University of Missouri School of
    Journalism, found that individuals who use Facebook excessively are far
    more likely to experience Facebook–related conflict with their romantic
    partners, which then may cause negative relationship outcomes including
    emotional and physical cheating, breakup and divorce.

    Read more at: http://phys.org/news/2013-06-excessive-facebook-relationships.html#jCp

    Facebook and other
    social networking web sites have revolutionized the way people create
    and maintain relationships. However, new research shows that Facebook
    use could actually be damaging to users' romantic relationships. Russell
    Clayton, a doctoral student in the University of Missouri School of
    Journalism, found that individuals who use Facebook excessively are far
    more likely to experience Facebook–related conflict with their romantic
    partners, which then may cause negative relationship outcomes including
    emotional and physical cheating, breakup and divorce.

    Read more at: http://phys.org/news/2013-06-excessive-facebook-relationships.html#jCp

    Facebook and other
    social networking web sites have revolutionized the way people create
    and maintain relationships. However, new research shows that Facebook
    use could actually be damaging to users' romantic relationships. Russell
    Clayton, a doctoral student in the University of Missouri School of
    Journalism, found that individuals who use Facebook excessively are far
    more likely to experience Facebook–related conflict with their romantic
    partners, which then may cause negative relationship outcomes including
    emotional and physical cheating, breakup and divorce.

    Read more at: http://phys.org/news/2013-06-excessive-facebook-relationships.html#jCp

  • Making Healthy Decisions – Part 8

    Hello everyone,Continuing on with our series on Making Healthy Decisions the question of today is:

    What Would Make Me Genuinely Happy?

    On the surface, this sounds like a no-brainer.  For some, getting a relationship back together is number one on their list!  For others, a new home, more money, better job, etc. is on their list.  For some, getting into a relationship is on their list.

    However, I am going to encourage you to rework that list!  I am not saying that all of those things above might not make you happy.  But is that what it would take to make you genuinely happy?  I guess a question within a question is "What is happy?"  That is a subject too big to tackle right here! Generally speaking, I do think it is a question to consider within the question of what would make you genuinely happy.

    I see so many folks working towards a relationship that they are sure is going to solve all their problems and,as they ride off into the sunset, they will be immediately happy.  Looking beyond that initial sunset, to see what that life would REALLY be like with that person is something that I often see overlooked.

    But in a broader sense of the subject of seeing what would make you genuinely happy, it's good old list time!  :-)  I highly encourage everyone to make that list!  If it is  just a one-word list that says, "Johnny" then you need to look beyond that, seriously.  What other things will make you happy?  How can you attain them?  If you are unhappy with your present circumstances and want them to change, what are you willing to do to change them?  How big of a role are you willing to take in your own happiness… your genuine happiness?  Will you listen to and/or take advice?  Will you explore all your options? How are you willing to try?

    Don't forget the small things, too!  Include them on your list! How many of these happy-makers did you do yesterday, last week, this year? Which ones can you indulge in today? When you're facing a challenge, ask what would make you happy in this situation.

    Cast a wide net!  You may have "buying a new car" on your list, but if you also remember that "dinner with friends"  and "playing with my dog" are great for you, you get to be happy every day–and that's important. What would make you happy now (that wouldn't make you unhappy later)? Do that!

    Then, take the decision you are trying to make and see what about it will or will not make you genuinely happy!

    Love, Mambo Samantha Corfield, www.spellmaker.com

    Happy
     

  • Is it worth it?

    Hello everyone!  I know we have talked about this subject before, but I thought it was worth revisiting.  All the time in readings I get asked the question, "Is s/he worth me doing (or continuing to do) love spell work on?"

    Generally speaking, I don't have an answer for that because I think that only you can tell if someone is worth your time, trouble, money, and energy.  That is what I usually tell you – "You tell me if s/he is worth it!"  Some of you laugh, some of  you get angry with me, and some of you find your thoughts provoked!

    In all fairness, some things that I can tell you is whether or not I think the person you are working on or considering working on is an inherently bad or good person.  (And, yes, I think some people ARE inherently bad and no amount of healing or goodie-two-shoes work on them is going to make them a good person!)  I can tell you if I feel any love for you there.  I can tell you if there intentions are good or bad towards you.  However, even knowing those things from me, only you can tell me if it is worth it.

    But what factors might come into figuring out if it is worth it?  Here is an excerpt from an article by Daniel Harken:

    "You're having problems in your relationship, and while you love your partner, you simply aren't sure as to whether it's worth saving. The vast majority of relationships can be saved – the question is, should you? This article will help you answer that question.

    The first question if you're deciding if your relationship is worth saving is if there is abuse involved. Whether this is physical or emotional abuse, it doesn't matter. If there is any kind of abuse going on, you need to get out of that relationship – if you have kids, this is especially imperative. No relationship is worth saving when there's abuse involved – it will only escalate over time.

    If there's no abuse, you then have to look at whether you enjoy being around this person or not. Are they one of your favorite people to simply hang around with? If not, you need to figure out if you can regain the good times or not. This requires some objectivity, but it's the simplest thing in the world – if you don't enjoy being around them at all, things need to change.

    If there's infidelity involved, you have to figure out how that's going to affect the rest of your marriage or relationship. If you can't trust them, or they can't trust you, is this going to become more of a problem over time, or less? Infidelity always has a profound effect on relationships, and, while it can be often-times be worked through, it can't always.

    Another question is: are your needs being met? Do you feel like you're being listened to, are you appreciated? If the answer to either of those are, there's a very fundamental problem in your relationship. It's nothing that can't be fixed – and in fact, changing your own behaviors can often lead to your partner changing theirs. You have to figure out if the potential is there, though in order to know evaluate if the relationship is actually worth saving.

    Figuring out your own behaviors is actually one of the absolute most critical steps here. You have to objectively look at what you are doing – are you belittling them? Are you constantly nagging at them, or making them feel inadequate or unappreciated? If so, or if you are doing other negative behaviors, are you truly willing to change?

    You have to assume that turning your relationship around will have to begin with you – are you willing to educate yourself and actually commit yourself to making changes? This is no small matter. That commitment will take a lot of effort, and a lot of learning. You have to retrain yourself to not be defensive anymore, and to be less critical and learn to show your appreciation of your partner, or your relationship will not be worth saving.

    After you evaluate all these factors, you need to sit down and really look at the situation. Are you willing to make the changes, do you think the potential is there for your partner to? Is marriage or couples therapy an option? Get out there and study up on more relationship information – the more you have, the better equipped you will be able to decide if it's worth saving, and the better you'll be if you actually try to save your relationship."

    End of Article

    So, as we can see, there are a lot of factors in the decision of whether a relationship is worth continuing or pursuing.  But I do want to bring up one last thing that I feel is of the utmost importance – you must always feel right about what you are doing.  Listen to your inner voice, your gut, whatever you want to call it.  No matter what anyone else says, if you feel right about the relationship, and you are being safe, then no one should be able to talk you out of going forward (or not) but you!  :-)  Your friends, family, myself, and anyone else you talk to may have a valuable opinion.  However, in the end, your happiness in your life, and the pursuit thereof is your choice to make.  Other people in your life may not see what you see in a person – that is fine, as long as you are true to yourself about what you see. 

    Love, light, and peace,

    Mambo Samantha  Corfield, www.spellmaker.com

    Betrue
     

     

  • Papa Legba month at Spellmaker!

    Hello everyone!  Once again, June is Papa Legba month here at Spellmaker!  :-)  As has become our tradition, we will be doing our free triple rituals for Papa this month!  It doesn't cost anything to be included and you can get all the details at on our Papa Legba Page.

    Our dear Sister Bridget is putting together a list of songs that people can use when serving Papa Legba. She is asking for suggestions, so please join her on her Facebook page!

    Additionally, on the Spellmaker Facebook Page we are having a discussion about different ways to serve Papa Legba! Please come on over and give us your ideas!

    When I was  starting to arrange Papa's altar today, he put this song in my head and now I cannot get it out – so sharing it with you! 🙂 In my head, the Sammy Davis, Jr. version is all I can hear!

    The Candy Man

    Who can take a sunrise, sprinkle it with dew
    Cover it with choc'late and a miracle or two
    The Candy Man, oh the Candy Man can
    The Candy Man can 'cause he mixes it with love and makes the world taste good

    Who can take a rainbow, wrap it in a sigh
    Soak it in the sun and make a groovy lemon pie
    The Candy Man, the Candy Man can
    The Candy Man can 'cause he mixes it with love and makes the world taste good

    The Candy Man makes everything he bakes satisfying and delicious
    Now you talk about your childhood wishes, you can even eat the dishes

    Oh, who can take tomorrow, dip it in a dream
    Separate the sorrow and collect up all the cream
    The Candy Man, oh the Candy Man can
    The Candy Man can 'cause he mixes it with love and makes the world taste good

    The Candy Man makes everything he bakes satisfying and delicious
    Talk about your childhood wishes, you can even eat the dishes

    Yeah, yeah, yeah
    Who can take tomorrow, dip it in a dream
    Separate the sorrow and collect up all the cream
    The Candy Man, the Candy Man can
    The Candy Man can 'cause he mixes it with love and makes the world taste good
    Yes, the Candy Man can 'cause he mixes it with love and makes the world taste good
    a-Candy Man, a-Candy Man, a-Candy Man
    Candy Man, a-Candy Man, a-Candy Man
    Candy Man, a-Candy Man, a-Candy Man

    ——————

     Hoping your world tastes great!

     Love, Mambo Samantha Corfield

    www.spellmaker.com

    Sw_candyman

     

  • Thinking of Giving Up?

    Good morning, dear readers!  I found this amazing list of folks who at first did not succeed, nor at second, third, and so on!  :-)  Yes, I know, sometimes we need to know when to say when.  However, in my opinion, people these days just give up too easily on their goals.  Folks are just so easily dissuaded from doing what they want to do or getting what they want to have.  I knew about a few of these "failures" before reading this list, but some of them were real eye-openers to me!

    Enjoy and be inspired!

    These businessmen and the companies they founded are today known around the world, but as these stories show, their beginnings weren't always smooth.

    1. Henry Ford: While Ford is today known for his innovative assembly line and American-made cars, he wasn't an instant success. In fact, his early businesses failed and left him broke five time before he founded the successful Ford Motor Company.
    2. R. H. Macy: Most people are familiar with this large department store chain, but Macy didn't always have it easy. Macy started seven failed business before finally hitting big with his store in New York City.
    3. F. W. Woolworth: Some may not know this name today, but Woolworth was once one of the biggest names in department stores in the U.S. Before starting his own business, young Woolworth worked at a dry goods store and was not allowed to wait on customers because his boss said he lacked the sense needed to do so.
    4. Soichiro Honda: The billion-dollar business that is Honda began with a series of failures and fortunate turns of luck. Honda was turned down by Toyota Motor Corporation for a job after interviewing for a job as an engineer, leaving him jobless for quite some time. He started making scooters of his own at home, and spurred on by his neighbors, finally started his own business.
    5. Akio Morita: You may not have heard of Morita but you've undoubtedly heard of his company, Sony. Sony's first product was a rice cooker that unfortunately didn't cook rice so much as burn it, selling less than 100 units. This first setback didn't stop Morita and his partners as they pushed forward to create a multi-billion dollar company.
    6. Bill Gates: Gates didn't seem like a shoe-in for success after dropping out of Harvard and starting a failed first business with Microsoft co-founder Paul Allen called Traf-O-Data. While this early idea didn't work, Gates' later work did, creating the global empire that is Microsoft.
    7. Harland David Sanders: Perhaps better known as Colonel Sanders of Kentucky Fried Chicken fame, Sanders had a hard time selling his chicken at first. In fact, his famous secret chicken recipe was rejected 1,009 times before a restaurant accepted it.
    8. Walt Disney: Today Disney rakes in billions from merchandise, movies and theme parks around the world, but Walt Disney himself had a bit of a rough start. He was fired by a newspaper editor because, "he lacked imagination and had no good ideas." After that, Disney started a number of businesses that didn't last too long and ended with bankruptcy and failure. He kept plugging along, however, and eventually found a recipe for success that worked.

    Scientists and Thinkers

    These people are often regarded as some of the greatest minds of our century, but they often had to face great obstacles, the ridicule of their peers and the animosity of society.

    1. Albert Einstein: Most of us take Einstein's name as synonymous with genius, but he didn't always show such promise. Einstein did not speak until he was four and did not read until he was seven, causing his teachers and parents to think he was mentally handicapped, slow and anti-social. Eventually, he was expelled from school and was refused admittance to the Zurich Polytechnic School. It might have taken him a bit longer, but most people would agree that he caught on pretty well in the end, winning the Nobel Prize and changing the face of modern physics.
    2. Charles Darwin: In his early years, Darwin gave up on having a medical career and was often chastised by his father for being lazy and too dreamy. Darwin himself wrote, "I was considered by all my masters and my father, a very ordinary boy, rather below the common standard of intellect." Perhaps they judged too soon, as Darwin today is well-known for his scientific studies.
    3. Robert Goddard: Goddard today is hailed for his research and experimentation with liquid-fueled rockets, but during his lifetime his ideas were often rejected and mocked by his scientific peers who thought they were outrageous and impossible. Today rockets and space travel don't seem far-fetched at all, due largely in part to the work of this scientist who worked against the feelings of the time.
    4. Isaac Newton: Newton was undoubtedly a genius when it came to math, but he had some failings early on. He never did particularly well in school and when put in charge of running the family farm, he failed miserably, so poorly in fact that an uncle took charge and sent him off to Cambridge where he finally blossomed into the scholar we know today.
    5. Socrates: Despite leaving no written records behind, Socrates is regarded as one of the greatest philosophers of the Classical era. Because of his new ideas, in his own time he was called "an immoral corrupter of youth" and was sentenced to death. Socrates didn't let this stop him and kept right on, teaching up until he was forced to poison himself.
    6. Robert Sternberg: This big name in psychology received a C in his first college introductory psychology class with his teacher telling him that, "there was already a famous Sternberg in psychology and it was obvious there would not be another." Sternberg showed him, however, graduating from Stanford with exceptional distinction in psychology, summa cum laude, and Phi Beta Kappa and eventually becoming the President of the American Psychological Association.

    Inventors

    These inventors changed the face of the modern world, but not without a few failed prototypes along the way.

    1. Thomas Edison: In his early years, teachers told Edison he was "too stupid to learn anything." Work was no better, as he was fired from his first two jobs for not being productive enough. Even as an inventor, Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. Of course, all those unsuccessful attempts finally resulted in the design that worked.
    2. Orville and Wilbur Wright: These brothers battled depression and family illness before starting the bicycle shop that would lead them to experimenting with flight. After numerous attempts at creating flying machines, several years of hard work, and tons of failed prototypes, the brothers finally created a plane that could get airborne and stay there.

    Public Figures

    From politicians to talk show hosts, these figures had a few failures before they came out on top.

    1. Winston Churchill: This Nobel Prize-winning, twice-elected Prime Minster of the United Kingdom wasn't always as well regarded as he is today. Churchill struggled in school and failed the sixth grade. After school he faced many years of political failures, as he was defeated in every election for public office until he finally became the Prime Minister at the ripe old age of 62.
    2. Abraham Lincoln: While today he is remembered as one of the greatest leaders of our nation, Lincoln's life wasn't so easy. In his youth he went to war a captain and returned a private (if you're not familiar with military ranks, just know that private is as low as it goes.) Lincoln didn't stop failing there, however. He started numerous failed business and was defeated in numerous runs he made for public office.
    3. Oprah Winfrey: Most people know Oprah as one of the most iconic faces on TV as well as one of the richest and most successful women in the world. Oprah faced a hard road to get to that position, however, enduring a rough and often abusive childhood as well as numerous career setbacks including being fired from her job as a television reporter because she was "unfit for tv."
    4. Harry S. Truman: This WWI vet, Senator, Vice President and eventual President eventually found success in his life, but not without a few missteps along the way. Truman started a store that sold silk shirts and other clothing–seemingly a success at first–only go bankrupt a few years later.
    5. Dick Cheney: This recent Vice President and businessman made his way to the White House but managed to flunk out of Yale University, not once, but twice. Former President George W. Bush joked with Cheney about this fact, stating, "So now we know –if you graduate from Yale, you become president. If you drop out, you get to be vice president."

    Hollywood Types

    These faces ought to be familiar from the big screen, but these actors, actresses and directors saw their fair share of rejection and failure before they made it big.

    1. Jerry Seinfeld: Just about everybody knows who Seinfeld is, but the first time the young comedian walked on stage at a comedy club, he looked out at the audience, froze and was eventually jeered and booed off of the stage. Seinfeld knew he could do it, so he went back the next night, completed his set to laughter and applause, and the rest is history.
    2. Fred Astaire: In his first screen test, the testing director of MGM noted that Astaire, "Can't act. Can't sing. Slightly bald. Can dance a little." Astaire went on to become an incredibly successful actor, singer and dancer and kept that note in his Beverly Hills home to remind him of where he came from.
    3. Sidney Poitier: After his first audition, Poitier was told by the casting director, "Why don't you stop wasting people's time and go out and become a dishwasher or something?" Poitier vowed to show him that he could make it, going on to win an Oscar and become one of the most well-regarded actors in the business.
    4. Jeanne Moreau: As a young actress just starting out, this French actress was told by a casting director that she was simply not pretty enough to make it in films. He couldn't have been more wrong as Moreau when on to star in nearly 100 films and win numerous awards for her performances.
    5. Charlie Chaplin: It's hard to imagine film without the iconic Charlie Chaplin, but his act was initially rejected by Hollywood studio chiefs because they felt it was a little too nonsensical to ever sell.
    6. Lucille Ball: During her career, Ball had thirteen Emmy nominations and four wins, also earning the Lifetime Achievement Award from the Kennedy Center Honors. Before starring in I Love Lucy, Ball was widely regarded as a failed actress and a B movie star. Even her drama instructors didn't feel she could make it, telling her to try another profession. She, of course, proved them all wrong.
    7. Harrison Ford: In his first film, Ford was told by the movie execs that he simply didn't have what it takes to be a star. Today, with numerous hits under his belt, iconic portrayals of characters like Han Solo and Indiana Jones, and a career that stretches decades, Ford can proudly show that he does, in fact, have what it takes.
    8. Marilyn Monroe: While Monroe's star burned out early, she did have a period of great success in her life. Despite a rough upbringing and being told by modeling agents that she should instead consider being a secretary, Monroe became a pin-up, model and actress that still strikes a chord with people today.
    9. Oliver Stone: This Oscar-winning filmmaker began his first novel while at Yale, a project that eventually caused him to fail out of school. This would turn out to be a poor decision as the the text was rejected by publishers and was not published until 1998, at which time it was not well-received. After dropping out of school, Stone moved to Vietnam to teach English, later enlisting in the army and fighting in the war, a battle that earning two Purple Hearts and helped him find the inspiration for his later work that often center around war.

    Writers and Artists

    We've all heard about starving artists and struggling writers, but these stories show that sometimes all that work really does pay off with success in the long run.

    1. Vincent Van Gogh: During his lifetime, Van Gogh sold only one painting, and this was to a friend and only for a very small amount of money. While Van Gogh was never a success during his life, he plugged on with painting, sometimes starving to complete his over 800 known works. Today, they bring in hundreds of millions.
    2. Emily Dickinson: Recluse and poet Emily Dickinson is a commonly read and loved writer. Yet in her lifetime she was all but ignored, having fewer than a dozen poems published out of her almost 1,800 completed works.
    3. Theodor Seuss Giesel: Today nearly every child has read The Cat in the Hat or Green Eggs and Ham, yet 27 different publishers rejected Dr. Seuss's first book To Think That I Saw It on Mulberry Street.
    4. Charles Schultz: Schultz's Peanuts comic strip has had enduring fame, yet this cartoonist had every cartoon he submitted rejected by his high school yearbook staff. Even after high school, Schultz didn't have it easy, applying and being rejected for a position working with Walt Disney.
    5. Steven Spielberg: While today Spielberg's name is synonymous with big budget, he was rejected from the University of Southern California School of Theater, Film and Television three times. He eventually attended school at another location, only to drop out to become a director before finishing. Thirty-five years after starting his degree, Spielberg returned to school in 2002 to finally complete his work and earn his BA.
    6. Stephen King: The first book by this author, the iconic thriller Carrie, received 30 rejections, finally causing King to give up and throw it in the trash. His wife fished it out and encouraged him to resubmit it, and the rest is history, with King now having hundreds of books published the distinction of being one of the best-selling authors of all time.
    7. Zane Grey: Incredibly popular in the early 20th century, this adventure book writer began his career as a dentist, something he quickly began to hate. So, he began to write, only to see rejection after rejection for his works, being told eventually that he had no business being a writer and should given up. It took him years, but at 40, Zane finally got his first work published, leaving him with almost 90 books to his name and selling over 50 million copies worldwide.
    8. J. K. Rowling: Rowling may be rolling in a lot of Harry Potter dough today, but before she published the series of novels she was nearly penniless, severely depressed, divorced, trying to raise a child on her own while attending school and writing a novel. Rowling went from depending on welfare to survive to being one of the richest women in the world in a span of only five years through her hard work and determination.
    9. Monet: Today Monet's work sells for millions of dollars and hangs in some of the most prestigious institutions in the world. Yet during his own time, it was mocked and rejected by the artistic elite, the Paris Salon. Monet kept at his impressionist style, which caught on and in many ways was a starting point for some major changes to art that ushered in the modern era.
    10. Jack London: This well-known American author wasn't always such a success. While he would go on to publish popular novels like White Fang and The Call of the Wild, his first story received six hundred rejection slips before finally being accepted.
    11. Louisa May Alcott: Most people are familiar with Alcott's most famous work, Little Women. Yet Alcott faced a bit of a battle to get her work out there and was was encouraged to find work as a servant by her family to make ends meet. It was her letters back home during her experience as a nurse in the Civil War that gave her the first big break she needed.

    Musicians

    While their music is some of the best selling, best loved and most popular around the world today, these musicians show that it takes a whole lot of determination to achieve success.

    1. Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart: Mozart began composing at the age of five, writing over 600 pieces of music that today are lauded as some of the best ever created. Yet during his lifetime, Mozart didn't have such an easy time, and was often restless, leading to his dismissal from a position as a court musician in Salzberg. He struggled to keep the support of the aristocracy and died with little to his name.
    2. Elvis Presley: As one of the best-selling artists of all time, Elvis has become a household name even years after his death. But back in 1954, Elvis was still a nobody, and Jimmy Denny, manager of the Grand Ole Opry, fired Elvis Presley after just one performance telling him, "You ain't goin' nowhere, son. You ought to go back to drivin' a truck."
    3. Igor Stravinsky: In 1913 when Stravinsky debuted his now famous Rite of Spring, audiences rioted, running the composer out of town. Yet it was this very work that changed the way composers in the 19th century thought about music and cemented his place in musical history.
    4. The Beatles: Few people can deny the lasting power of this super group, still popular with listeners around the world today. Yet when they were just starting out, a recording company told them no. The were told "we don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out," two things the rest of the world couldn't have disagreed with more.
    5. Ludwig van Beethoven: In his formative years, young Beethoven was incredibly awkward on the violin and was often so busy working on his own compositions that he neglected to practice. Despite his love of composing, his teachers felt he was hopeless at it and would never succeed with the violin or in composing. Beethoven kept plugging along, however, and composed some of the best-loved symphonies of all time–five of them while he was completely deaf.

    Athletes

    While some athletes rocket to fame, others endure a path fraught with a little more adversity, like those listed here.

    1. Michael Jordan: Most people wouldn't believe that a man often lauded as the best basketball player of all time was actually cut from his high school basketball team. Luckily, Jordan didn't let this setback stop him from playing the game and he has stated, "I have missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I have lost almost 300 games. On 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game winning shot, and I missed. I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."
    2. Stan Smith: This tennis player was rejected from even being a lowly ball boy for a Davis Cup tennis match because event organizers felt he was too clumsy and uncoordinated. Smith went on to prove them wrong, showcasing his not-so-clumsy skills by winning Wimbledon, U. S. Open and eight Davis Cups.
    3. Babe Ruth: You probably know Babe Ruth because of his home run record (714 during his career), but along with all those home runs came a pretty hefty amount of strikeouts as well (1,330 in all). In fact, for decades he held the record for strikeouts. When asked about this he simply said, "Every strike brings me closer to the next home run."
    4. Tom Landry: As the coach of the Dallas Cowboys, Landry brought the team two Super Bowl victories, five NFC Championship victories and holds the records for the record for the most career wins. He also has the distinction of having one of the worst first seasons on record (winning no games) and winning five or fewer over the next four seasons.

    Bookmark this post!  Next time you are thinking of giving up, give it a read over!

    Love, light, and peace,
    Mambo Samantha Corfield
    www.spellmaker.com

    Will-way